On May 4th, 2022, a beautiful young Black woman by the name of Arlana Miller wrote her final suicide note on instagram and then took her life. Her family panicked when they saw it, searched for her but to no avail. From what I understand, she was later found in a Mississippi River. In her note, which I will post in full below, she mentions water and peace… I write this with shaking hands, because this should have been known about and spread all over the place on May 4th, 2022.
While her instagram post has been removed, I feel it is important to share it. She shared it; she wanted these words to be heard. And she clearly wanted people to learn from what she went through and learn from what she felt was a hopeless position. Black suicide is rising, especially among children but not solely among children. And 19 years old is not what I consider to be an adult, either. She was under too much pressure, all of which it seems she felt she had to keep to herself.
And that is another reason posting the suicide note she wrote publicly is so vital, in my opinion. More attention needs to go into learning the signs of depression and other mental illnesses, more attention needs to be given to reenforcing the knowledge that it is okay to be depressed, and it is okay to reach out for help when you are anywhere close to the line of feeling suicidal.
There is no shame in mental illness except the stigma associated with it and the community maintaining a taboo outlook on speaking of anything related to mental health. It’s not only a white issue, clearly. She notes that she wishes her granddad was still alive to tell her it’s not worth it, that she is being “stupid”- but he had already passed on, and I suppose she felt she could go to no one else.
“I have been surrounded by people who may have honestly thought that I was okay, but I havn’t been okay for a while,”
She also makes a request of others:
“To the people in my life I pray you learn to vocalize your feelings and get help always!!! I failed at that and I’m afraid it’s too late,”
Who is Arlana Mille?
She was a beautiful Black female attending Southern University and A&M College in Baton Rouge with a major in . a cheerleader and struggled with depression for along time…in her own words,
“May this day bring me peace. I have fought the urge since my early teenage years. I gave this life all the fight I had. To everyone who has entered my life, I’m so grateful and I can only imagine how this may find you. I have been surrounded by people who may have honestly thought that I was okay, but I haven’t been okay for a while.”
She adds further along something every single person needs to hear:
“I hope this teaches everyone to check on your “strong” friends, be present always! I’m contradicting myself but NEVER give up!!! I know that I’m letting a lot of people down by what I’m about to do, but truth is I have already let down so many people throughout my life and it just feels unbearable.”
I have no words to express the sadness I feel over yet another loss, a loss which could have been prevented. This is a common problem; silence and judgment from stigma related to feeling their emotions are not worth discussing, or, having no one to discuss them with.
What is more is that this happened on May 4th of this year. I found out about it by chance, why was this not all over twitter? Why is her death silent? Especially after posting a public suicide note. We all know why it is silent; and that is even more reason why I ask you to please share this…
Too many people are suffering in silence just as she was…especially in the Black community. Action needs to be taken, steps need to be made to help destigmatize mental illness and help prevent the increasing number of suicides…
And here is her heartbreaking farewell note, which she posted to instagram before taking her life.
To this beautiful young woman… I hope you have found peace, and I hope your new journey is beautiful and blesses you abundantly. I did not know you personally, but your words and story have left an impression on my heart so that I will never forget you. I am so sorry you found yourself feeling this was the only way, you are forever cherished and loved and missed. No one can take your place in this world; a part of the world is forever gone now and the world will be a little less bright without you in it.